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Things You Should Never Do For A Man

Women usually take over roles that have nothing to do with them when they are in a relationship, which is a terrible way of living. Here are five things you should never do for a man even if the world is coming to an end.

Be The Provider. 

Paying bills for a man when we haven’t won the war on the gender pay gap is the worst you can ever do for yourself. It never ends well and that is how women end up in the kind of mess that befell the women in Netflix’s documentary The Tinder Swindler.

Moreso, we are living in very patriarchal societies, especially in Africa, men tell us explicitly every other day that they love through providing. Paying bills is opening a can of worms as it opens you to financial and even physical abuse because most men always end up feeling emasculated in situations where they don’t have a coin to their name.

Moreover, with the growth of male gold diggers, unless you are sure that keeping a man is something you want to practice, you will provide and end up feeling used. 

Let Him Move Into Your House. 

If a man is moving into your house it is probably because he doesn’t have a place to live. You will be taking financial responsibilities you shouldn’t have to and it will complicate your life in painful ways that could have otherwise been avoided, had you done the moving-in process more diligently.

If you are going to move in with a man, make sure you are getting a new house together where there’s a mutual rent-sharing agreement.

Women are barely being paid enough. You should never take over the role of housing a man who doesn’t have a place to live unless you are heading to the road of self-sabotage.

Fight His Battles.

A lot of women make the mistake of meddling in a man’s affair. I often see it on social media where women take it upon themselves to defend men in whatever issue, especially abuse allegations.

It is important to understand that people have different experiences. How you experience a man is not how his former girlfriends experienced him and because most of us do not understand that we usually end up involving ourselves in issues that do not have anything to do with us.

Halle, a black American singer has been defending her boyfriend this last week over abuse allegations tabled by his former girlfriend. This is something we have seen before with other women and they always end up being thoroughly embarrassed because these allegations usually turn out to be true.

It is not your duty to hold the fort for a man over issues that happened before you came along. Those are his battles to fight and you should let him deal with them without meddling.

Fight His Baby Mama.

A man is accused of not paying child support and the next thing it’s his wife and girlfriend who are on social media insulting the mother of his child on his behalf.

It is bad behaviour and a terrible lack of boundaries. If a man is having issues with the mother of his child, there are lawyers and children’s courts to help him navigate that. 

You do not want to be the woman defending a deadbeat dad who will probably be a deadbeat dad to your children too. It is horrible. 

Help Him To Pay Your Dowry.

Some women take loans to pay their dowries for marriages that never last. You have no business chipping in your dowry payment because it is a clear indication that the man you are marrying is not financially ready for responsibility as serious as marriage.

If you are paying your dowry, how will this person provide after the wedding? Is he equipped to even pay rent? Can he take care of a child if it ever gets to that? 

Finances are everything in the current system of things. You cannot survive with a person who cannot meet his end of the bargain.

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